why break apart when we can stand together?

One take away I had from the meetings yesterday, which to be honest, I had a few. (Though in 6 hours I wanted to have more than just a few!) But one of the ones that I had stems back to how we are wrong about education. Reading and math are no different. Reading and social studies are no different. Math and science are no different. These things we compartmentalize shouldn't be compartmentalized. You can't draw the line at how reading is different than math. It's murky. We read about science, but they are separate? Now graphs are part of social studies but not math? These concepts are one in the same. Don't know what to do in reading? Reread the sentence. Don't know what to do in math? Reread the problem. Want to know what a word means? Break it apart or look at the context clues. Want to know what a number means? Break it apart or look at the context numbers.

These strategies we teach work for every subject, so why don't we teach the strategies rather than the topics? Yes, kids need to read and yes kids need to memorize certain things, but mostly, kids need to learn how to think. Not copy, not look back and regurgitate what they read, but genuinely think. Think about how they could prevent something today, think about what they know about the chemicals and what the reactions might do. Think about how this story affects them and how they would feel if they were that character. Think about how their math could be seen in the daily world and how it will affect them when they need it.

We need to stop separating things or students will never understand that the strategies they use can work for anything. Summarize the word problem (make a number sentence), Use a graphic organizer (draw a picture) to go with the story (problem). Let's teach students how to think rather than what to think. Let's allow them to explore new methods and find new ways they can make connections. Let's not boil our education system down to perfect, neat boxes when in reality life is rarely either and never both.

Reflective by nature

Change Leaders said "This book is about the wise practitioner rather than the abstract theorist; the reflective doer, not the smart operator; the deep accomplisher, not the overt hero." If I had to pick one of those that speak to me I would be the reflective doer. I do the best I can and it isn't always right. But I learn from it and tweak as I go. I am not happy until I find the system that works best for me, that works best for my class that is the best for what I am looking for. And I try to do that within my means. But I do believe that reflecting is such a crucial part of life that I wish more people knew how to do it.

The best conversations I ever have involve two people that reflect on their experiences, where they came from and why they are who they are. Being reflective is such a crucial element of life that so many take for granted and even more never explore the possibilities of.

How often do you take a step back and ask yourself "how could I have said that better?" "How could I have handled today better?" "If I could go back what would I change?" Instead, we fill our brains with constant filler so we can't explore these thoughts and miss out on these incredible opportunities.

Boss vs. Manager

This is the second time in my life that someone has asked me to instruct people with a lot more experience, a lot more money and a lot more knowledge on how to be better than they are. I taught multi-million dollar CEO's how to run their business (something I knew personally, nothing about) and now I am facilitating veteran teachers who have been teaching for a minimum of 5 years more than I have, how to work together and make their teaching better.

So, one of my tasks is to read this book, Change Leader, and I am not a big highlighter, I don't care much about coming back to places in books, but one thing I do enjoy doing is reflecting and that is what this book wants us to do. There is no room for it, no pages that say "okay reflect now" but that the best leaders are the ones that look around and say "this is okay... but what if it could be this?" I have been talking to many of you about the math and what it is missing and what went wrong. I have spoken with many of you on how teaching could be better, how classrooms could be better, how education could improve and for once, I feel like those thoughts aren't for nothing. They aren't lost on deaf ears and if I could find my place in this and find a path to follow where being reflective helps others, I may have a job after I get burnt out on teaching (which working 95 hours may speed up drastically).

Consider the best boss you ever had. What made them great? For me, they were real people. They wanted to get to know you and cared about you. They expected greatness from you and did what they could to help you enjoy your job. They didn't blindly follow the big wigs or what the last email/research/meeting said and did what they knew was best for their team, for you. They believed in you and your abilities and they critiqued and made it better.

I have had some amazing bosses in my life but I have also had some horrid ones. I have had bosses that critique everything you say and take the you, out of the job. They take your soul out of your passion and they try to make you a new them. I don't want to be them. I like to be me and I like the aspects of myself that I have allowed these villains to replace and to taint. I have had bosses make me change what I know and what I do just to take one more stab at you. I have had bosses that could care less about you. You are a means to an end for them and if they can make you look good, well then they may move up the ranks. I have had bosses who never say a single nice thing about you and I have had bosses who don't jump in and help when you need it.

So what makes a good boss, good? What makes a bad boss, awful? Well looking at my critiques a few things stick out to me that matter to me. Bosses need to care more about the individual then they care about the system but more importantly, then they care about themselves. A good boss believes in their workers and let them know it. A good boss finds the highs and the lows and makes both improve. A good boss finds what makes you tick and increases it whether it is challenges, positive remarks, acceptance, etc. They want you to be better and find what works for you. They adapt, they concede and they listen.

So if I am meant to be a leader, at these meetings and always, I should do the same. I don't need to change myself to follow a theory, I don't need to shape people in the way I have been shaped but I need to see the struggles and the positives and support both and figure out what makes my people tick and bring them up.

leaders don't know it all

For my extra job at work (By the way did you know teachers get extra jobs on top of our already crazy jobs) I am a facilitator for our meetings and collaborations. At first, I was intimidated that I was asked (and I really basically mean told) to do this. But I am finding it interesting that as a new teacher to this school, so much is already expected out of me. I like that I am being challenged and I like that I don't need to prove myself. If anything I need to live up to the expectation of those in charge. I like that I can be myself and say the things that I think whether they are all PC or not and that those ideas can spiral me upward.

What a change from my last school where I constantly was belittled, our ideas didn't matter, we were told what to do, how to do it and what it should look like. It was a daily struggle to find time to reflect for yourself and even if you did, those reflections didn't matter because you had a certain way you were required to do things.

But in a setting where I am believed in, challenged and expected greatness from. I, personally, thrive. I want to be great, I enjoy a challenge and above all I want what is best fro the children I work with.

So for this facilitator job, I was afraid of being the leader of teachers. I have not been teaching the longest, I don't have all the answers and I am always actively learning for my job. So how can I be in charge? But in reality, I am always in charge. I am in charge of 21 students. I am in charge in group projects and I am organizational and sound. The leader doesn't need the answer, the leader needs to know what we are working with and move us forward.

That is something I can do. My "weakness" of not having the answers will inspire others to work together to find the answers. But I went to the meeting and I was inspired. I can be a facilitator of learning, I can force my group to work together and find a way to defeat the common enemy. I can rally the troops and I can attempt to keep us on task. Facilitating is my job. That's what a teacher is, and changing tunes and looking at adults is the same way.

We don't need as many community builders, we don't need as many rules in place becuase we understand what society is and how to interact with our peers, however, we do need time to work together and the ability to learn from each other and that's something I do all the time. So why not lead others in doing the same?

Music is written

My take-away from my writing class today is that detail is more than the descriptive elements in a story. Such as the colors and the things your senses can feel. What is great about details is descriptions like that, aren't necessary. Sometimes it is equally necessary to get into someone's head or to overhear a conversation. When an author uses details, it is not meant to add color or add vivacious words but to add a depthness to a character that otherwise wouldn't be known. This way the character is an individual.

In some ways, music is taking the opposite approach lately. They try to make songs that relate to everyone. In stories, you want to make that person and give them their own identity. (Though I suppose as a musical artist you want to give your song its own identity.)

Where works

Best and worst place to write:

She sat there on the couch curled up with a glass of tea next to her and nobody was home. Her internet had gone out an hour ago as she sat in the silence completely undisturbed. She pulled out her notebook from next to the crackling fireplace and wrote. She wrote about another world similar to ours but yet so different. Then she wrote for hours as the thoughts flowed out of her inner mind and grasped at the truth within her own heart.

It seemed like everywhere she turned added on another job for her day. The laundry never ended, the dishes had piled up and her toddler, Nick, had another sleepless night. As he cried in his crib, as she placed him down for a nap, she grabbed for her notebook. The pages had been ripped out by grimy, sauce-drenched fingers. She tried to drowned out the shrills as she got transformed into a world full of palm trees, fruity drinks and a handsome man with perfect, auburn hair.

Follow the echoes

I need to start carrying a notebook with me so when I have a few minutes I can write. For instance during my lunch break at school or in my car.

I also have been delving into music a bit more lately. I notice that some lyrics can spur me to write so I am hoping some of the new bands I am listening to can do the same for me.

"When it's all said and done I'll follow the echoes"

There she was walking down the same alley she did every night her bar closed. She found peace in the middle of the night when the animals lerked and the people slept. She could listen to her own thoughts and get some variation of memories and fantasy that would play out in her head like a movie.
As she walked under the ghostly yellow lights, she searched for her keys in her purse. That's when she heard the Earth shattering scream. No lights turned on, no animals screeched back. It was as if it didn't happen at all. But Allison knew better. She could still hear the echo in her mind and she followed her thoughts like breadcrumbs trying to recognize what happened and find a way to help.

But the streets remained empty and the sound disappeared into the dark. The light ahead of her went out and a giant of a man walked out from the darkness.

That's when she realized that the scream was hers all along and no one would follow the breadcrumbs of forgotten thoughts.