Most people feel a need for love. They believe if they even get a nip on the end of their fishing line, they need to reel in, quick. They are insecure with their own skills and need the help of the proof. "If I catch one... I am OBVIOUSLY good enough." They need to physically see the fish on the end of their hook.
But how many fast, little fish do they need to catch before they realize that they know how to fish? At some point they will feel that nip and realize that they want to see whats farther, what can be deeper and what can really satisfy their fishing cravings. They have heard the stories, after all, about the fisherman down in California who caught the biggest salmon ever or the largest catfish in Thailand, while all they are catching are baby blue gills. And they want it. They want to feel the satisfaction of knowing they can handle it. That they are experienced enough to pull it off.
So they research into what bobs to use and what hooks work best. They look into the different fishing lines and fishing hooks to best meet their needs. Fishing becomes more about their talents than it does about their luck in the waters.
And thats the difference. In relationships there are two kinds of fisherman. The ones that sit and wait to get lucky. The ones that view the other person as a way to feel completed. They need the proof. They need the first thing they touch and they clench onto it.
Then there are the fishermen that know they will get the big one. They are patient enough to sit there knowing they have something to give to this process. They have researched what works and what doesn't. How to act and how to be themselves. They are confident in who they are and what they want. And those are the fishermen that strive.
I wrote a thought a few weeks back that I wanted to look into. "Maybe the only way of holding onto a relationship was holding off."
It is an interesting theory to say the least. That "holding back" from someone in all aspects of the terms means that you will be stronger in the end. That maybe in the world where we rush in and out of stores; money in and out of bank accounts; and friends in and out of our lives, we need to take the time and slow down for something (and someone) meaningful.
Maybe the reason everyone dates so young is because they expect their relationship to give them meaning. (Much like the first fisherman.) They don't believe in themselves, so they need someone else to.
But to really love, is to love yourself. What you do and how you do it. It is a matter of knowing what you want and knowing why. To do this, you need to back off sometimes. You need to research. You need time for yourself and what you believe in.
Because there are a lot of fish out in the sea. But aren't you sick of looking for blue gills? Don't you want the best ones for yourself?
