blackout

Saturday, July 11, 2009

And she dreams of falling asleep under the stars.
Wishing away for the boy that will make her more than just a friend.
For the boy that will save her from hell. For the boy who truly believes she’s beautiful.
For the boy that will bring her to her happily ever after.
It’s funny.
That even after the heartbreak that everyone knew was coming,
even through the pain, torture and agony,
she still believes in destiny.
She still believes that love is out there and that she will find it.
That her prince charming is waiting and that one day, one day he will save her.
You knew a lot about me.
But what you didn’t know is
that I am strong enough to do this.
I am strong enough to say goodbye.
I am strong enough to mean it.
And I will finally let go.
There is a story here
underneath the pain
there is a story of a girl
that finally made it
a girl that finally showed
the smile that has been
missing from her face
the eyes shining with joy
the overall ecstasy on life.
She’s figured out the key to happiness
so don’t listen to what they tell you...
when you stop loving
you can begin living again.
the memories started coming back
I feel like I am getting off my high
Time to go smoke up again
The weeds of freedom and lies
I need to keep the drugs inside
to make it through the night
otherwise when I arrive
all it will be is another broken fight
but if I keep the thoughts going.
if I make it through the tears
if I get back in the shape I was
I won’t have any fears
I will make it through this somehow
this won’t be my end
just another hit of laughter
to make it round the bend

and I just need to psych myself out.
Tell myself it was worth it.
Tell myself there is a point.
I can’t let my guard down.
I cant back down now.
I have to keep fighting.
I have to keep moving along.
If I just keep the tempo,
if I just keep the pace.
Than nothing will destroy me.
Then I will be able to face the day.

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