1. When it appears that you have killed the monster, NEVER check to see if it's really dead.
2. Never read a book of demon summoning aloud, even as a joke.
3. Do not search the basement, especially if the power has gone out.
4. If your children speak to you in Latin or any other language which they should not know, shoot them immediately. It will save you a lot of grief in the long run. However, it will probably take several rounds to kill them, so be prepared. This also applies to kids who speak with somebody else's voice.
5. As a general rule, don't solve puzzles that open portals to Hell.
6. Never stand in, on, or above a grave, tomb, or crypt. This would apply to any other house of the dead as well.
7. If appliances start operating by themselves, do not check for short-circuits; just get out.
8. Do not take ANYTHING from the dead.
9. If you find a town which looks deserted, there's probably a good reason for it. Don't stop and look around.
10. Don't fool with recombinant DNA technology unless you're sure you know what you're doing.
This is an email that I recieved from my mother. It should be expected that I read this email and appreciated the insight, however I think it is missing some crucial elements. Since it is now October, I thought I would add some of my own Horror Movie Tips2. Never read a book of demon summoning aloud, even as a joke.
3. Do not search the basement, especially if the power has gone out.
4. If your children speak to you in Latin or any other language which they should not know, shoot them immediately. It will save you a lot of grief in the long run. However, it will probably take several rounds to kill them, so be prepared. This also applies to kids who speak with somebody else's voice.
5. As a general rule, don't solve puzzles that open portals to Hell.
6. Never stand in, on, or above a grave, tomb, or crypt. This would apply to any other house of the dead as well.
7. If appliances start operating by themselves, do not check for short-circuits; just get out.
8. Do not take ANYTHING from the dead.
9. If you find a town which looks deserted, there's probably a good reason for it. Don't stop and look around.
10. Don't fool with recombinant DNA technology unless you're sure you know what you're doing.
Horror Movie Safety Tips - Part Two...
1. When it appears that the monster is dead, shoot it again.
2. Never follow the black guy, he is always the first to die.
3. Follow the most attractive girl (or have her follow you) odds are she makes it to the end of the movie alive.
4. If someone's head spins around their body, understand that shit is going down and you need to run the other way.
5. Remember the supernatural is smarter, faster and stronger than you.
6. As a general rule, wear turtleneck sweaters in case of a vampire.
7. Do not let a black cat cross your path. Walk sideways if need be.
8. Always have a getaway plan.
9. Have food stored in case of the Apocalypse.
10. If you see the sign of the devil, RUN.
11. Don't take candy from a stranger.
12. Don't take an apple from an old lady.
13. Don't take anything from a pyramid.
14. If there is a pretty long path and a spooky short path, take the pretty one.
15. Always stick in groups.
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| Okay so I know this is not a scary picture, but even as a female this movie concept scares the crap out of me. This pictures sure didn't help. What sick wierdos do we have coming up with these? |
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