professionals treated like animals

I think it's bullshit that people can put me down, harass me and verbally abuse me because I am a teacher. So because I went to school, I get to be treated as less? Or is it because I work with children you have the right to treat me like one? Better yet is it because you have a child that you have the right to treat me as an inferior?

I chose this profession and I knew that parents complicate this job but I'm appalled that verbal abuse should just be let go like it didn't happen. That it should becomes water under the bridge just because the parents need to "get it off their chest" or because they were feeling frustrated.

What about me? I slave over the books and the papers and my world is about your child. And you don't think I have feelings? Like I don't need to be treated better than this? Like I don't deserve to?

But you can scream at me, advise me how to be "successful" as a teacher and demand more of my after work time to be devoted to your child.

You want to complain about me and what I am doing. Be my guest. But do not share those thoughts with me.

I chose a profession where I am giving myself up for this job. I chose a profession and fall in love with my children each year. I chose a profession that allows me to change the world.

I didn't do it to get your lip or to be your personal servant who you can berate and put down just because you are having an off day. Think before you send something. Be professional.

Positivity is key

Finally, finished the book. I would be curious how my past workers feel about me as a leader. I was not a know-it-all. I listened to their concerns and made them my own, I helped them problem solve (two heads are better than one) and I created ideas and checklists as I went to help myself figure out what to work on. Oh, that preschool was my baby but it was also my burden.

Looking where I am now, I am the youngest of my cohort by a landslide (everyone I teach with is minimally 20 years older than I am). I am not expected to be the leader by them, I am expected to be lost and immature. I believe in some aspects I am expected to fail. And that doesn't mean that they don't respect me or like me or learn from me. Just that being the youngest and least experienced isn't the person you pick to lead.

So how do I become a leader of a group of leaders? (After all, that's what teachers are.) For one, I admit to my weaknesses both in lack of experience and in what we are doing. I also need to be on the same page as them but keep us on track. (This is something I may struggle with because effective learning happens when you get off the track). I need us to bounce ideas off of each other and let people complain about the system but also work on ways to resolve those complaints. I need to enforce "take aways" (what you are walking away from the conversation with that you can use) and actionable requests (your homework). And I have to do all this without it being a burden (on themselves or on me!)

I think this could really work. I think my group is pretty good about listening (And loves to complain) now we have to make it manageable and hopefully cut down some of our work time. This is going to be interesting.

Managing ‘‘has to be learned . . . not just by doing it but by being able to gain conceptual insight while doing it’’ 

 I started reading the book Change Leader and I was inspired by the first few lines of the book expecting to see greatness at the turn of every page. Really, all you have to do is read the preface and the chapter titles. The rest of the book is trash. I am struggling to finish it. But I will and then it will all be over.

On the flip side, I do think education needs this book and I like that my district provided it to me. It is showing me that the district knows there are problems and that they know they aren't fixing it.

It is focusing on looking internally, at the organization and at your own abilities and working with a team to step up the game. I think this is exactly what can fix education. Teachers working together, teachers deciding what is going on, teachers focusing on what they know each other needs.

Why at the beginning of the year doesn't the principal ask us where we struggle? As teachers, I am sure we would share because we have to reflect on what we do daily. So instead of giving us pointless Professional Development on: Recess, How to group student work or how to put the unit in the answer of a math problem. We could be diving into the actual issues: some teachers struggle with classroom management, others with inspiring the students, others with finding ways to use the textbook without pulling your hair out. I personally, suck at test making. These are the things that we could really be focusing on and diving into. And every year it may change and every year it may not, depending if the teacher is satisfied with their improvement.

But it would be much more beneficial and we could have actual conversations about problems some teachers face daily. Wouldn't we all want to help those that we know are struggling with something, we personally, feel good about and strong with?

After I left the preschool, I said that never again would I want to be a principal, but depending on how things move around and things change in education. I could consider it. I am a natural leader, I am not some micromanaging bitch (hell, I don't even pay attention to the details). So I may have to consider it when I get burnt out on teaching (and again with these 95 hour weeks, it is possible that happens sooner than later).

why break apart when we can stand together?

One take away I had from the meetings yesterday, which to be honest, I had a few. (Though in 6 hours I wanted to have more than just a few!) But one of the ones that I had stems back to how we are wrong about education. Reading and math are no different. Reading and social studies are no different. Math and science are no different. These things we compartmentalize shouldn't be compartmentalized. You can't draw the line at how reading is different than math. It's murky. We read about science, but they are separate? Now graphs are part of social studies but not math? These concepts are one in the same. Don't know what to do in reading? Reread the sentence. Don't know what to do in math? Reread the problem. Want to know what a word means? Break it apart or look at the context clues. Want to know what a number means? Break it apart or look at the context numbers.

These strategies we teach work for every subject, so why don't we teach the strategies rather than the topics? Yes, kids need to read and yes kids need to memorize certain things, but mostly, kids need to learn how to think. Not copy, not look back and regurgitate what they read, but genuinely think. Think about how they could prevent something today, think about what they know about the chemicals and what the reactions might do. Think about how this story affects them and how they would feel if they were that character. Think about how their math could be seen in the daily world and how it will affect them when they need it.

We need to stop separating things or students will never understand that the strategies they use can work for anything. Summarize the word problem (make a number sentence), Use a graphic organizer (draw a picture) to go with the story (problem). Let's teach students how to think rather than what to think. Let's allow them to explore new methods and find new ways they can make connections. Let's not boil our education system down to perfect, neat boxes when in reality life is rarely either and never both.

Reflective by nature

Change Leaders said "This book is about the wise practitioner rather than the abstract theorist; the reflective doer, not the smart operator; the deep accomplisher, not the overt hero." If I had to pick one of those that speak to me I would be the reflective doer. I do the best I can and it isn't always right. But I learn from it and tweak as I go. I am not happy until I find the system that works best for me, that works best for my class that is the best for what I am looking for. And I try to do that within my means. But I do believe that reflecting is such a crucial part of life that I wish more people knew how to do it.

The best conversations I ever have involve two people that reflect on their experiences, where they came from and why they are who they are. Being reflective is such a crucial element of life that so many take for granted and even more never explore the possibilities of.

How often do you take a step back and ask yourself "how could I have said that better?" "How could I have handled today better?" "If I could go back what would I change?" Instead, we fill our brains with constant filler so we can't explore these thoughts and miss out on these incredible opportunities.

Boss vs. Manager

This is the second time in my life that someone has asked me to instruct people with a lot more experience, a lot more money and a lot more knowledge on how to be better than they are. I taught multi-million dollar CEO's how to run their business (something I knew personally, nothing about) and now I am facilitating veteran teachers who have been teaching for a minimum of 5 years more than I have, how to work together and make their teaching better.

So, one of my tasks is to read this book, Change Leader, and I am not a big highlighter, I don't care much about coming back to places in books, but one thing I do enjoy doing is reflecting and that is what this book wants us to do. There is no room for it, no pages that say "okay reflect now" but that the best leaders are the ones that look around and say "this is okay... but what if it could be this?" I have been talking to many of you about the math and what it is missing and what went wrong. I have spoken with many of you on how teaching could be better, how classrooms could be better, how education could improve and for once, I feel like those thoughts aren't for nothing. They aren't lost on deaf ears and if I could find my place in this and find a path to follow where being reflective helps others, I may have a job after I get burnt out on teaching (which working 95 hours may speed up drastically).

Consider the best boss you ever had. What made them great? For me, they were real people. They wanted to get to know you and cared about you. They expected greatness from you and did what they could to help you enjoy your job. They didn't blindly follow the big wigs or what the last email/research/meeting said and did what they knew was best for their team, for you. They believed in you and your abilities and they critiqued and made it better.

I have had some amazing bosses in my life but I have also had some horrid ones. I have had bosses that critique everything you say and take the you, out of the job. They take your soul out of your passion and they try to make you a new them. I don't want to be them. I like to be me and I like the aspects of myself that I have allowed these villains to replace and to taint. I have had bosses make me change what I know and what I do just to take one more stab at you. I have had bosses that could care less about you. You are a means to an end for them and if they can make you look good, well then they may move up the ranks. I have had bosses who never say a single nice thing about you and I have had bosses who don't jump in and help when you need it.

So what makes a good boss, good? What makes a bad boss, awful? Well looking at my critiques a few things stick out to me that matter to me. Bosses need to care more about the individual then they care about the system but more importantly, then they care about themselves. A good boss believes in their workers and let them know it. A good boss finds the highs and the lows and makes both improve. A good boss finds what makes you tick and increases it whether it is challenges, positive remarks, acceptance, etc. They want you to be better and find what works for you. They adapt, they concede and they listen.

So if I am meant to be a leader, at these meetings and always, I should do the same. I don't need to change myself to follow a theory, I don't need to shape people in the way I have been shaped but I need to see the struggles and the positives and support both and figure out what makes my people tick and bring them up.